1. My late mother was an educator for her entire life, a teacher from age 21 to 65, until she was forced to retire by the education board here in Northern Ireland. Not impressed by this imposed retirement, she continued as a classroom assistant until aged 70.
2. Her passion was education - both teaching and learning. When her slow descent into ill-health began, in early 2018, her and I would spend hours talking. This conversation continued unbroken until she slipped into severe dementia about four months ago. As I've mentioned...
3... on this platform before, she never really understood social media, but she did understand that, well, her son had an audience. As such, about a year before she passed away, she asked me to tell you all the four regrets she had on entering a care home, and then a nursing...
4... home, in the hope - educator that she was - that some of you might glean some wisdom from her own, self-admitted, mistakes.
First, if you fall for no obvious reason, talk to your GP or other healthcare professional as soon as you can. My mother had been falling without...
First, if you fall for no obvious reason, talk to your GP or other healthcare professional as soon as you can. My mother had been falling without...
5... injury for many years prior to the fall that started her slide into frailty, a fractured right shoulder. Mum realised, too late, that had she addressed her falling much earlier, she could well have maintained more independence in her later life.
6. Second, also address any mental health problems you have as early as possible. My mum had Generalised Anxiety Disorder (GAD), but, like many people of her generation, resisted therapy. She deeply regretted that, as her GAD made her transition to nursing care much more...
7... difficult for her than it would have been otherwise. In addition, at least two occupational therapists cited - correctly, in my opinion - her anxiety as being one of the main reasons she continued to fall so often.
Third, never, ever lose touch with the latest...
Third, never, ever lose touch with the latest...
8... communication technology. My mother deeply regretted not being able to use a smartphone, tablet, or laptop once she became effectively unable to get out of a bed or a chair unassisted. That ability to connect with the world is critical to maintain.
9. Fourth, and finally, if you ever have to go into long-term care, always, always make sure you have an advocate outside the nursing home. For mum, that was me, of course, but even if the nursing home is the best imaginable - and my mother's was - having someone outside...
10... is very important indeed. A family member, a friend, even someone you employ in the role (which my mum would have done had I become incapacitated). It is a vital component of long-term care.
This may help some of you now, or in the future. They are certainly lessons...
This may help some of you now, or in the future. They are certainly lessons...
11... I will never, ever forget /end
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